Overthinking again.

I saw pictures of my sister's old friends. Somehow it got me to think about my past, with all the stupid stuff I did and how I was very-Well-awkward then. In all of the pictures I found, I thought. Shit I'm not doing much these days, these people

are doing way much more than I am. And then I get kind of sad for no apparent reason. Because I'm not doing much at all and I'd like to get out; Do more things more often.

I overthink about everything because that's how it gets started, thinking about shit that I shouldn't be thinking about at all. When I get like this, I start to worry. Now, I should just stop. Take a breather and look at where I am right now, I've gain nothing but

I also didn't lose anything.

Forget it.

When I'm thinking about something, anything that comes to mind I completely freeze. It goes into my head, then I start to obsess about it. Everywhere I go, I can see this idea in my head playing out. As an imaginator, I thought about movies a lot. And when I think about movies, I get these scenes in my head where I start to imagine certain characters interacting like real life people. It sucks to not be writing what their doing down, because I don't have any enthusiam anymore. Again, though It's just imagination. And I use to write whole pages of words that meant something when I was into it. Now I don't.

It's hard to not think about anything else either. Then again, what is there to think about.

Digitize

I remembered a movie I saw in the theatre, in Hilcrest, long ago.

A movie called Melquiades Estrada. Made by Tommy Lee Jones (An actor who starred in The Fugitive, Batman Forever, and The Client) who wrote this movie about an immigrant who looks for work and befriends his boss. I thought about movies like this when I watch Blockbusters like Transformers, The Dark Knight, and Wall-E; Who makes movies with some heart? I don't even know. I'm not a very good film critic. I like a movie to have fluidity, something that can pull me in different directions while entertaining me. I like have a good variety of movies to watch and this one changed my view of how movies can be made.

But enough movie talk, being that I delete my recent post after this entry and am starting new with everything I know this month. I've had a somewhat hard week, coming back from Arizona on a small trip and enjoying the relaxing heat. I was cooking like bacon, though. HA! I'm gonna try and save money whenever I can, so I can enjoy more vacations like the one I had on monday.